Living the dream is published on the 27th of every month by Tania Basheer of Blue Sky Coaching.
by Tania Basheer, Publisher

Special Anniversary Edition: 10 Relationship Skills for the Almost Perfect Marriage

Vol 5, Issue 5
27 November 2009

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Quote of the month

" Most women will tell you that you're a fool to think you can change a man, but those women are quitters!"

- Marge Simpson talking to Lisa about her father

Next month's feature:

10 Ways to Ease Money Worries

In this issue:


Welcome to Living the dream, Blue Sky Coaching's monthly e-zine, written for small business owners, young entrepreneurs and service industry professionals and filled with cutting edge success tips to help you skyrocket your income, enjoy more personal time and be known as a star in your field. 

If you enjoy receiving Living the dream e-zine, please pass it on to anyone else you think might like to receive it too. Every 50th subscriber will receive a $50 Myer gift card and so will you, if you were responsible for referring them.

You can read all previous issues of Living the dream e-zine any time at:

Hi! from Tania

Hi there,

Guess what? I've just done a quick check and noticed that today's e-zine edition is my 50th. Wow! I almost can't believe it. 

Speaking of anniversaries, tomorrow is our 11th wedding anniversary - something else that's hard to believe - and it's my inspiration for this month's feature article. Thanks Rick!

Now, to find the almost perfect anniversary gift. Hmm, I think a great way to kick off my shopping trip might be with a relaxing massage.

Warm wishes,


Tania Basheer - Publisher
Living the dream e-zine

Feature: 10 Relationship Skills for the Almost Perfect Marriage

Feature: 10 Relationship Skills for the Almost Perfect Marriage

When  I saw Stephanie Dowrick's book The almost perfect marriage on the shelf at my favourite book shop, I couldn't resist buying it. 

I wondered, what does an almost perfect marriage look like? I'm almost sure it would be something different to each one of us, including our partners!

According to Stephanie, it's not your age, sexuality, wealth, religion or culture that will determine the success of your relationship. It's your willingness to discover what love truly means.

Here are 10 attitudes and actions she suggests to support a genuinely loving, intimate relationship:   

  • Saying 'yes' to it all: The moments you might not have chosen, the habits you've only just discovered, the differences in opinion and experience - these all add depth to your relationship. The wonderful moments are precious too. And they can be increased. What counts most though is saying 'yes!' to it all, loving and accepting your partner wholeheartedly, and allowing yourself to be loved and accepted also. 
  • Take your power seriously: You have the power to lift your partner's spirits or to dash them. Take this power seriously. The choices you make will profoundly affect your partner, your relationship and yourself. 
  • Being loving matters much more than being right: When it comes to love, think like a poet not an accountant. Don't keep a ledger of who has done what and what you are owed, nor how often you are right and your partner is wrong.
  • Give your partner the very best of yourself: Your partner will always be more, not less, vulnerable to you attitudes and behaviour than anyone else. Don't expect your partner to make allowances that you would not assume from other people. Give your partner the very best of yourself. Always.
  • Honour one another: In a healthy relationship, power is shared between equals. Differences in age, gender or wealth should not be barriers to a basic belief that your partner's life, opinions, choices, experiences, actions and decisions are of equal value to your own.
  • Be aware of your moods: Finding your partner unbearably annoying? This is the moment to ask, 'What's going on with me?' Rather than projecting your negativity onto someone else, those bleak moments are a priceless chance to grow in insight. Be aware of how dramatically your own moods determine whether you are critical or appreciative.
  • Praise, encourage, admire and validate: Do this explicitly, lavishly and imaginatively. This has three great benefits: it lets your partner know that you love and appreciate them; it reminds you of what's wonderful about your partner; it's the best possible defence against taking one another for granted.
  • Make time for one another: It isn't possible to build a relationship with someone who is never there. Quality time counts for something only when there is a reasonable quantity of it also. Make time for one another, even and especially when there is 'no time'.  
  • Your relationship is not a mini-corporation to be run with maximum efficiency: Let it be passionate, creative, soothing, spontaneous, relaxing, uplifting, messy, romantic, precious and unpredictable.
  • The almost-perfect couples exercise:  On your own individual sheets of paper, formulate your vision for yourself and your relationship, but write the sentences as though you've already achieved them. 'We settle our differences easily'. 'We talk a lot'. 'We have fun'. After 20 minutes or so, compare what each of you has written. Underline the sentences that express much the same intention. Decide which sentences are the most important to you both. Write out a fresh sheet with just those sentences on it and put that sheet up where you can see it and be inspired by it. Keep all the sheets in a folder. Date them. As you repeat this exercise over a number of years they will tell a rich story.

For more business, executive and life coaching tips to help you achieve your goals and create and live the life you've always wanted, visit: To find out more about how you can work with me personally, visit:,  or call me on 0411 471 941 or (08) 8338 3134 or e-mail me on

Know Your Brain: Transform Your Performance

Event details

1 December 2009

9 am - 4 pm
Doltone House
Pyrmont, Sydney
Presenter: David Rock

Investment: $147
Price includes one full day of training, all meals and a handy workbook to take home.

Based on concepts from David Rock's new book: Your Brain at Work: Strategies for overcoming distraction, regaining focus and working smarter all day long.

Dramatically improve your performance and productivity

An exciting one day workshop with CEO and founder of Results Coaching Systems, David Rock.

What you'll learn:

  • How to improve your productivity through understanding what’s happening in your brain
  • How to prioritise effectively so you can get more done
  • The secrets of making solving problems easier
  • The power of insights for motivation and getting into action
  • Strategies to keep your cool when the pressure’s on
  • The 5 things you need to know about getting the most from others

Heal Your Relationships with EFT

Relationships can be loving and deeply fulfilling or emotional minefields, especially when a relationship goes sour or ends. Although we can't change what's happened in the past, we can change the way we feel about it, which can help us move forward.

EFT is a great tool to use to heal relationship issues. With the use of EFT we can quickly diffuse distressing emotions so  we can view our relationships from a more balanced perspective and make necessary changes.

Visit and learn EFT any time through one of my EFT Home Study packages, or call me on (08) 8338 3134 or 0411 471 941 if you'd like to arrange a one-to-one session, workshop or conference presentation.

Spring Coaching Competition

Spring Coaching Competition

Winner drawn tomorrow - 28 November 2009. 

Enter now at for your chance to WIN two life coaching sessions with me PLUS a copy of the book The Breakthrough Experience by Dr John F. Demartini. Valued at over $A250!

This book is about breaking through the barriers that keep you from experiencing your true nature as light. It contains an inspiring combination of science and philosophy, presented in a completely accessible way that makes even the most profound concepts easily understood.

Through the extraordinary but true stories of ordinary people having astonishing and moving life experiences, you'll discover and explore the universal laws and principles that underlie your very existence. Most importantly, this is an extremely real and practical manual for understanding why you live the way you do and how to transform your life into your highest vision.

Previous competition winner: M. Merrett

Next Month: 10 Ways to Ease Money Worries

As we head into the Christmas season, and, for many of us, extra holiday spending, remember to go easy!

Research links financial stress to depression, high blood pressure, insomnia, fatigue, digestive ailments and overeating.

Next month we'll look at ten ways to ease money worries without needing to win a lottery. Interestingly, a study showed that lottery winners and paraplegics were equally happy a year on from their life-changing event.

Sponsors and Advertisements



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Contact Joanna for an appointment on 0407 791 484.

429 Henley Beach Road

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little luv

handmade and vintage goodies for little luvs


Have you heard about the new South Australian business, launched this month called little luv, specialising in handmade and vintage goodies for little luvs?

You can find little luv at the Goodwood Christmas Market on Saturday 28 November from 9 am to 3 pm and the Child and Baby Market in Norwood on Sunday 13 December from 9 am to 3 pm.

Mardi Zeunert, the creator of little luv, has some great items available, many of which have been handmade using vintage and new fabrics.

You will find:

  • birdy mobiles
  • save the whaleys mobiles
  • nonite owls
  • nanna teddies and
  • vintage children's books

Great ideas for Christmas and also fantastic gifts for mums-to-be. You'll be the talk of the town at the next baby shower with a beautiful, one-of-a-kind gift.

For further information contact Mardi on:

Tel: 0438 886 522





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