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10 Ways to Give Feedback Sucessfully

Living the dream is published on the 27th of every month by Tania Basheer of Blue Sky Coaching.
by Tania Basheer, Publisher

10 Ways to Make New Friends

Vol 8, Issue 8
27 August 2012

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Quote of the month

'A true friend is one soul in two bodies.'

-  Aristotle

Next month's feature:

10 Ways to Give Feedback Successfully

In this issue:


Welcome to Living the dream, Blue Sky Coaching's monthly e-zine, written for small business owners, young entrepreneurs and service industry professionals and filled with cutting edge success tips to help you skyrocket your income, enjoy more personal time and be known as a star in your field. 

If you enjoy receiving Living the dream e-zine, please pass it on to anyone else you think might like to receive it too. Every 50th subscriber will receive a $50 Myer gift card and so will you, if you were responsible for referring them.

You can read all previous issues of Living the dream e-zine any time at: www.blueskycoaching.com.au/ezine.

Hi! from Tania

Hi there,

Strangely, it feels like winter has become colder and wetter as we approach spring this year! We'll definitely be booking in a getaway to Queensland or a sunny island somewhere next winter - Hawaii would be nice! 

This month's feature article was inspired by a reader, Rebecca, who mentioned to me recently that it seems harder to make new friends as we get older. I've also included a snippet about the importance of keeping in touch with our girlfriends. No reminder needed there for me. Enjoy! 

Warm wishes,


Tania Basheer - Publisher
Living the dream e-zine

Feature: 10 Ways to Make New Friends

Most of us know more than 100 people (how about all of our Facebook and LinkedIn friends), but how many of those people would you call your good friends?

So, apart from being friendly (which works really well), how do we as adults make new friends? Asking 'Will you be my friend?' just doesn't work like it used to when we were kids does it?

Here are 10 other ways you can try to make new friends:

  1. Reach out to people: I know this might feel strange or uncomfortable at first if you've been raised to 'not talk to strangers' (unlike me who had a mother who could strike up and carry a conversation with anyone, even if they couldn't speak English!). Reaching out to people you'd like to be friends with and breaking out of your comfort zone to do it is worth the effort. Inviting them out to an event is a great way to get to know someone better. If that seems too large a step, then start by striking up a conversation with them and follow up with them later.
  2. Follow up: OK, so you met someone whom you like and would like to get to know better. Now what? Follow up on your initial meeting by e-mailing them, invite them to be a friend on Facebook or Linkedin, or call them and, this time, invite them to do something with you. Offer more than one alteranative too, like drinks, an event or coffee.  
  3. Treat people as if they already are your friends: Enjoy speaking or interacting with people, be interested in them and really listen to what they're saying. Don't rush your interactions. Let people know you have time for them. When you do, you'll send out vibes that make you really likeable to others. Note to business owners: this works equally well with potential clients too - treat them as if they are already your clients and see what happens. 
  4. Say 'hello' to people instead of waiting for them to say 'hello' to you: Acknowledge people. You might not become best friends, but it's easier to strike up a conversation later if you have established that familiarity and shown that you're friendly and open to establishing a friendship.  
  5. Steer clear of gossips: There's an old Turkish saying 'If someone gossips to you, they'll gossip about you!' So, be wary of befriending a gossip if you discover this about someone you meet - they might not make an ideal friend - and be especially careful of what you share with them.  
  6. Be yourself: When we are ourselves (and stop behaving in a way we think is 'right') we let our unique light shine into other people's lives, which in turn makes them feel comfortable being themselves with us. I don't think anyone wants to be friends with a fake!
  7. Befriend your friend's friends: A quick way to make new friends is to make friends with your friend's friends. You can easily get to know these people at your friend's gatherings or parties or, if you know who it is you'd like to get to know, invite your friend to something, or host your own party or gathering, and ask your friend to invite their friend along. If you're actively wanting to make friends, be willing to go to parties and events even if you don't know who'll be there. It's an opportunity to meet someone new.   
  8. Do a course for fun or join a sports team: There are many adult learning opportunities available. Try a cooking, jewellery making or yoga class for example, or join a sports team - old scholars, a local competition, or create a social team combining your work colleagues, your friends and friends of your work colleagues.
  9. Join alumni, old scholars or other networking groups: Again, there are numerous groups and associations hosting events throughout the year you can join. I belong to two groups - The Adelaide Network (since 2000) and SASSI and have met some great friends through both of these. 
  10. Travel alone: Explore the world and connect with like-minded people. I took a 10-day Insight tour of Europe in my 20s travelling alone, and within an hour, I'd made 5 friends who were great to travel with. And, interestingly, two of them are now married to each other. 

Read more tips: 10 Ways to Strengthen Your Relationships; 10 Relationship Skills for the Almost Perfect Marriage; 10 Tips for Finding Your Soul Mate; 10 Tips for Meeting a Great Partner; 10 Ways to Enjoy Your Relationships; 10 Tips for Talking and Listening to Each Other; 10 Ways to Spice Up Your Relationship; 10 Ways to Have a Hot Relationship; 10 Tips for Successful Conflict Resolution10 Tips for Dealing with Difficult People.

For more business and life coaching tips to help you achieve your goals and create and live the life you've always wanted, visit: www.blueskycoaching.com.au/ezine/index.php. To find out more about how you can work with me personally, visit: www.blueskycoaching.com.au, or call me on 0411 471 941 or (08) 8338 3134 or e-mail me on  tania@blueskycoaching.com.au.


Make Time to Catch Up with Your Girlfriends!

In an evening class at Stanford University the last lecture was on the mind-body connection - the relationship between stress and disease.

The speaker (Head of Psychiatry at Stanford) said, among other things, that one of the best things a man could do for his health was to be married to a woman, whereas for a woman, one of the best things she could do for her health was to nurture her relationships with her girlfriends. At first, everyone laughed, but he was serious.

Women connect with each other differently and provide support systems that help each other to deal with stress and difficult life experiences. Physically, this quality 'girlfriend time' helps to create more serotonin - a neurotransmitter that helps combat depression and can create a general feeling of wellbeing. Women share feelings, whereas men often form relationships around activities. We share from our souls with our sisters/mothers, and evidently that is very good for our health.

He said that spending time with a friend is just as important to our general health as jogging or working out at a gym. There's a tendency to think that when we are exercising we are doing something good for our bodies, but when we're hanging out with our friends, we're wasting our time and should be more productively engaged. Not true! In fact, he said that failure to create and maintain quality personal relationships with other humans is as dangerous to our physical health as smoking.

So every time you hang out with a girlfriend, pat yourself on the back and congratulate yourself for doing something good for your health!

EFT Can Help Heal Relationship Traumas

Have you experienced a relationship trauma - bullying, abuse, death of someone close to you or the ending of a close relationship or friendship that came as shock? 

EFT is a very effective tool in assisting with processing feelings, such as grief or shock from current or past events and experiences, that can be barriers to enjoying existing or forming new relationships.

Visit my EFT website now for details about how you can learn to use EFT quickly and easily, anywhere, anytime, and start making positive changes and enjoying life. While you're there, remember to enter my monthly EFT competition for your chance to WIN my EFT home study package, valued at $97!

I'm also available for personal consultations, speaking engagements and EFT group workshops on Thursdays and Fridays between 10 am and 5 pm.

Please call me on 0411 471 941 to discuss your needs and/or to book in a time.

Winter Coaching Competition

Winter Coaching Competition - Enter Now!

Drawn soon! Enter now for your chance to WIN two business or life coaching sessions with me, plus a copy of Coach yourself into action: How to get what you want with 7 simple strategies by Mary Lou Johns. 

Prize valued at over $400! 

For all those people who procrastinate, hold back, or are fearful about setting out in new directions, Mary Lou has provided ways to get you moving. She clearly describes a practical and energising set of simple strategies that work.

Autumn Competition Winner: P. Watts

Next Month: 10 Ways to Give Feedback Successfully

It's not only what you say but the way that you say irt that can make all the difference in the world when providing feedback.

Next month I'll share 10 tips on giving feedback so you are successful in getting across the message you need or want to convey. 

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The Show Bag Chauffeur is Back!


Book today and make the most of our popular annual service.

Yes, the Royal Adelaide Show is just around the corner! Enlist Lifestyle Elements to help make the day as enjoyable and stress-free as possible!

This service is always popular but we only have a limited number of slots available. To add your name to the list, email Tim on tim@lifestyleelements.com.au


$75 incl GST plus cost of show bags, includes:

  • entry ticket to the show
  • time to select show bags
  • delivery within 10 kms of the Adelaide CBD


Simply let Tim know which bags you'd like to purchase and we'll collect them for you and deliver them to your home or workplace.


On the first day of the Show, Friday 7 September.

The 'Wish-List' tool on the Royal Adelaide Show website makes this task even easier!


Check the price and contents of each bag and add it to your wish list. Then, email your 'Wish-list' to Tim on tim@lifestyleelements.com.au by Wednesday 5 September so we can pick up exactly what you're looking for.



On-line Job Search -

What websites to use and how to get the best out of them


Tuesday 4 September 9.30 am - 12.30 pm at Marion Centrelink, Oaklands Park


Wednesday 5 September 9.30 am - 12.30 pm at Noarlunga Cenrelink, Noarlunga

A demonstration of the best websites to help your career direction and job search plus find out which websites will help you access workshops and fr.ee career development services for job seekers.

Includes Skills for All, Forward IT, getting the right jobs emailed direct to you and how to use Centrelink on-line. Please let any job seekers you are in contact with know about these workshops.

Facilitated by HR Development at Work and sponsored by the Department of Further Education, Employment, Science and Technology (DFEEST) which aims to create on-line opportunities for all South Australians. Working together with business, industry and the community, DFEEST seeks to help all South Australians get connected.

Bookings: bh@developmentatwork.com or 8322 8455.

HR Development at Work was awarded an achievement award in 2008 by the Hon Paul Caica MP, Minister for Employment Training and Further Education, for excellence in undertaking a skills formation program with South Australia Works, assisting job seekers to move forward on their career path.


Reading this ad? Then why not place yours here. Do you have a product, service, workshop or special offer that you'd like to let hundreds of entrepreneurs, SOHO business owners, busy professionals and business executives know about? To find out more about advertising in this e-zine and to reserve your spot for next month, e-mail Tania your details today at tania@blueskycoaching.com.au and include 'e-zine ad' in the subject line. As a subscriber to this e-zine, you can receive f.ree advertising, based on availability, if you submit your advertising copy to me by the 20th day of the month.

Advertising Disclaimer: Blue Sky Coaching does not endorse or represent the accuracy or reliability of any of the advertisements included above or the quality of goods, services or information obtained by you in connection with engaging the services of or purchasing goods from the above suppliers.

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